Side Note, from The Note

Every morning I receive an email from ABC's "The Note." It's a general overview of anything and everything going on in politics, in DC and abroad. If you haven't signed up for it yet, I suggest you do.
One thing I love about it: HUMOR. I love that they can take jabs at D's & R's, and it never seems to be bias. This morning something I found particularly funny was a "memo" to Howard Dean...Read on...
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TO: GOV. DEAN
FROM: DNC STAFF
RE: SO FAR

With successful trips to two Red States under your belt and not a single public (or even cowardly on-background) quote leveled against you from a Democratic strategist/leader/operative, you are off to a fine start. But there are some things we think you could do, uhm, better.
Here's our list:

1) Implied in your insistence that we call you "Governor" instead of "Chairman" seems to be a forlorn fondness for your former employ and a disdain for your current job. Keep this up and we may end up splitting the baby and just calling you "the politician-formerly-known-as-front-runner." [Keep this up and we may end up insisting that you call us "former McAuliffe staffers." Stings a little, doesn't it?]

2) We know you're sick of hearing it, but that's okay because frankly three weeks in, we're already sick of telling you: watch the language. Osama bin Laden is evil. Lionel Ritchie music is evil. Astroturf is evil. Republicans are not evil. Entirely.

3) The Fabulous Flournoy has been captaining the ship well, but we have no idea who her lieutenants are. Vagueness was okay on week one. And two. And arguably three. But we're now nearly on week four of the new Dean regime and we need two words our party seems allergic to — "org chart."

4) Word to the wise — staff is a constituency, and like any constituency you have to win us over. You can't do that if you won't talk to us. The last guy here wouldn't shut up — and we loved him for it.

5) Psychologists say room decor reveals a lot about a person. Actually we just made that up. But it does sound like something they would say. Anyway, we're ascribing that to them to make a point: your office is too spare. Where's the campaign memorabilia, the 11 framed balanced budgets, the conspicuously absent Trippi photo, etc.?

6) Terry was to Cafe Milano as Howard is to . . . What? Until you can answer that question, you're not really our chairman. That said, we're here to serve. From what we've gathered from our time together so far, you're probably a tad more earthy; we recommend you consider Nora, Two Quail and Ben's Chili Bowl.

7) Get out there more. Yes, yes. We understand that you're trying to send the signal that you're here to work and don't wish to hog the limelight. But Sen. Clinton's first year in office proved that you can both stay low key and get more exposure for it.

8) Whenever you first ride the DC Metro, we wanna come with.

9) Look, we're not going to name names here, but we all know where you lodge while in town and, well, while admirable, we would feel safer if you upgraded to at least a Motel 6.

10) Stop lighting incense all over the building. People are growing suspicious.

11) It's always a good idea to let state parties know you might be coming to their state to visit. In advance, we mean.

12) Our blog: sure it's fun and all, necessary too, but NOT SUFFICIENT.

13) As you know from reading The Note every day, we're soclose to defeating bush on Social Security. So let's pony up some $ — our side needs it.

14) Hello. We are your staff and we are here to help. Let us. Otherwise we'll turn into a soft, gentle people and it won't be pretty.

15) But…on the other hand: hey hey, ho ho, some of us have got to go.

16) Can we keep Tina?

17) GOP leadership? '08ers? Tell us how to go after them. Bush no longer matters.

18) The Republican Party has a very clever plan to keep you from re-making your public image. Don't be fooled by that Ken Mehlman "good cop" stuff. You can be one of the best chairs this party has ever had, or you can end up a cartoonish joke.

19) Do you have a plan — secret or otherwise — for the next four years? If so — and if it needs to be secret to work — by all means, keep it secret.

20) Transitions are hard. For all of us.

Thanks for hearing us out.